My last radiation planning appointment is this morning, after my teeth cleaning. When you are getting chemo you can't get your teeth cleaned because of all the germs that get flung around in your mouth. Before I started back in late June I got my teeth cleaned, so I am very excited to get them done again. I can't remember if I posted this or not, but the other day on of my molars just decided it was done and so the front of it exploded when I was eating bread. Luckily it was just one part and I only needed a filling.
I am feeling anxious about the radiation. I am sick of everyone telling me its no big deal. How the hell does everyone know that? I have heard very unpleasant stories, and stories that it was harder than chemo, so this statement drives me even more crazy. I hope that I am fine and I hope that it isn't a big deal, but who knows. I mean, please it is RADIATION. Its not like I am just going to pop myself into a tanning bed for quick ten minute tan up. I am choosing to get radiated. My radiation oncologist said that not much of my lung is involved which is great.
Today I need to fill my prescripstion for the Biofin, I think that is what you call it. I have heard wonders about this, wonders about lots of stuff. My Rad. Onc. said really who knows if any of it works, and who's to say the skin wouldn't heal just the same without it. I am nearing the end of treatment.
The other day my Triple Negative friend found out a year and a half out that her cancer migrated to her brain. I am devastated by this news. Sad because she was told she only has two years left, sad that breast cancer sucks, sad that each breast cancer survivor especially the triple negative has a high reoccurance/migration stage the first three years. JUST SAD.
How the hell did the TN live through all the chemo and radiation? It stays small for a year and a half and then wham, there you are showing up, lite up in an MRI in the brain.
So, for all those that didn't think I had anything to worry about, and why wasn't I happier when I found out I was only a stage 1, there is your answer, another answer, another reason.
Is that for the rest of my life, and for the next three years, when I I am all done with treatment and I get to start counting my three year mark, I will have the potential of this on my shoulders. She was given just two years. I hope she is around to at least be there for her little girl when she starts her moon.
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5 comments:
Hi Heather,
As far as the side effects, Radiation was easier than chemo, but it wasn't a cake walk. I had considerable fatigue, but my hair was growing and my nails were making a comeback. I did use creams right after each session and my skin held up and there was some discomfort in the area but nothing that was horrible.
I wish that there was something we could do for B.A.
I don't know what to say, but I just wanted to say something.
So:
Something.
much love.
T
Glad you are having radiation for such a short period of time. My skin broke down, it was extremely painful, then it healed, like most things do. Mine was 30 days in a row. I got tired of the trips, and at the end of radiation, I was just plain tired. My dose was very high because my tumor was sitting on my chest wall.
I am sorry about your friend. I suspect she was not a stage I? My long time friend also had mets. to the brain. She had several positive nodes. It does make a difference. I had many positive nodes, a huge tumor, and ten years later I am fine. You have had a big hit to your life, like many others, and you are moving into your new Heather. It's been a difficult nine months. I am happy that you are gaining energy, hair and eyebrows, off steroids! You are done with chemo, radiation, hospitals. I am so happy for you that you can look forward to a healthy and productive life in all the years ahead.
sn
Something in you blog prompted me to think that you had a short radiation course and it was already OVER!
Now i realize that is not correct. I thought you were just beginning, so guess something caused me to think you had a REALLY short course!
I know how you feel from switching from every week to every month to see the doc. It was like a security blanket to go every week.
Heather, I am so sorry about your friend. I can't imagine how sad you are and how scare you are for her and how this makes you scared for you own life.
I'll pray for your friend when you come to mind (and you, too, of course).
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