What happens to all those memories of the past
Filed away in some lost trash bag
Mourning yet again, a new rites of passage
I thought I'd just mourn entering adulthood
Leaving that childhood at the beach
Sacred
Getting married there was a bit of mourning
The end of my freewheeling days.
But this time
This Breast Cancer time,
Has stampeded my heart like leaving the safety of home,
Of the Beach.
I only feel safe in my past strengths
As if I've raised myself these past decades to be
A Survivor, to know I can make it.
I feel so scared, abandoned by my Own body.
My own mind, spirit, soul, blood, and lymph
Will I make it?
To where?
How?
What will I be then?
I wonder now, who is this body, this spirit, this soul?
Does she have the chance?
Or am I just part of the worlds chaos
