The Looks

Yesterday, as I was checking out of the health food store, and pushed my cart to go outside I got overwhelmed with tears. How is it that I "got" cancer. I ate everything right, I had the right mind frame, I exercised, I just don't get it. I let it wash over me, as well as the looks I get from people. But yesterday, the looks got to me and the fact that I caught my breast cancer early at the little old age of 33 just freaked me out. I got really sad. I got a few tears in my eyes and I got to my car and then I let it go. Life. My life. Life. How? Why? How is it possible? Why me? How come? How? How? How is it possible? What could I have done differently? What can I do differently? My future? Its scary. I wish I could know what my cancer feeds on, and what happened to make it start growing in the first place.

Today I am almost back to normal. I went to the office as I am in the middle of a few deals right now. I got wiped out pretty fast and am now back on the coach trying to relax and not feel sick to my stomach.