Off to chemo

Well...today number three. Tomorrow, I can say, "Just two more!" I have been pretty weak all week. I went grocery shopping, stopped by my office, and got really sick just being out. My eyes are still flowing with tears. I am getting really sick of it. And starting to worry that the surgery didn't "take". I worry about snowboarding for instance. With gloves on, goggles on, and the cold weather, it would be very difficult to wipe my eyes so I can see to snow board!
I am afraid my counts are super low again, and he might cancel my chemo today. But maybe not, it seems I am always wrong about these things. Food is all together gross right now. The idea of eating just makes me sick to my stomach. I usually wake up starving and have what I am going to make for breakfast fixed up in my mind before I get out of bed. The past few days, I can't eat until around 10 and then its a small amount before I start getting sick. Right now I have eggs boiling, that sounds good for lunch.
D is taking me to chemo today. I will post a picture later if I feel up to it. I want pic's of the last three with me getting the chemo and me holding up my fingers. The count down is on!!

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Chemo did get cancelled. I am back in bed now. My blood counts are so low that he said if they get any lower I could end up in the hospital. So...now I will be done January 7th. I am so bummed. I begged, I mean begged him to give it to me. Will see if this week ends up being a good week. Last break I had was such a disappointment that I am not getting my hopes up.

Today's the day..

Well...today is 6 of 12! Tomorrow, I can say I only have 5 chemo's left. I can't wait to be done. My eyes the past couple of days have been a constant river of tears. Not tears from emotional outcries, but from the scar tissue that is not allowing them to flow correctly. My right eye is especially puffy, reddish purplish bluish from the checkbone to the lower eyelid. It burns and so I called the eye specialist today. He is only 1 of 8, and is considered the top specialist in state. So, if you know any kids that are going into the medical field tell them to go into the Ophthalmology: Oculoplastics field. Anyways, so he wants me to come in and see him today. I am hoping there is some kind of cream he can give me to help the skin not be so inflammed. Cross your fingers for me.
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I've been weighed in at my doc's office. I am now sitting waiting for him to come in and tell me my counts are good and to send me up to chemo. Folks.. I am in disbelief. My onc told me I'd probably gain 20 pounds from the chemo. The nurse today, said they don't know why woman gain this amount, but just that it happens. I have officially gained a whopping, stunning 16 pounds. Its not like I am laying around eating Bon~Bons.
I am sick about it. SICK!! I can't wait till this is all done, and I can start exercising like a freggin' maniac. 16 pounds. Wow!